”
When we first got Topsy, she would be allowed to sleep in the bed with me…when Colin came, an absurd edict was introduced whereby she was no longer allowed upstairs.
When we first got Topsy, she would be allowed to sleep in the bed with me…when Colin came, an absurd edict was introduced whereby she was no longer allowed upstairs.
I evidently had a lot of anger and hate in me about this, because I would perch at the top of the stairs and lure her to come up - “Topsy! Topsy! Topsy!” Then, when she would slink nervously upward to the forbidden terrain of the upper floor, I would would suddenly become Mr. Hyde. “Oh dear, Topsy,” I would declaim, in a rather arch manner, “you know perfectly well you’re not allowed upstairs” before cruelly kicking her back down to the bottom again, where I would rejoin her and give her a sympathetic cuddle, regretfully muttering, “Oh Christ! Were you kicked down the stairs? This is terrible.”
That’s quite fucked up, isn’t it?
Yes, Russell Brand, yes, it is.
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